Who's the Meaner Cleaner?


A behind-the-scenes look at my own unfiltered shenanigans from the marketing trenches. A real-life, no BS view of what it's really like to market a small business and ideas to make it all feel a whole lot easier!

In 5th grade, I did a science experiment to test which cleaning product worked the best. I've always been a bit obsessed with cleaning.

It was all part of learning the scientific process, controlling variables, and analyzing data as objectively as possible to get real, data-backed answers.

I dubbed it "Who's the Meaner Cleaner."

Mr. Clean won hands down, by the way.

Maybe this experience at age 11 set me up for my absolute annoyance when it comes to marketing tips from "experts."

And it flared again a few weeks ago while I was mindlessly scrolling after the kids went to bed (IYKYK). As I was flipping through reels, there was one variation that kept coming up over and over again...

"I posted 250 Trial Reels so you don't have to, and this one hook is the magic key to unlocking Instagram."

My eyes rolled so hard they almost got stuck in the back of my head.

Maybe it worked for them, but where's the data to show how it will work for me?

What was the control? Was it just random posting until one accidentally went viral or resulted in 100 new followers?

Give me the science, people!

I want to know the VALUE of a trial reel based on the goal I want to achieve.

What type of trial reel converts vs. goes viral? What content do people keep coming back to (aka evergreen) vs. completely ignore?

Is there a formula we can develop (not just a cookie-cutter hook)?

Quick pause: What are Trial Reels?

If you haven’t heard of Trial Reels yet, here’s the short version:

Trial Reels are Reels shown only to non-followers on Instagram. They aren't on any other platform.

You can choose to post them to your feed later, but most people don’t.

They’re designed to:

  • Reach people who don’t follow you
  • Test content without spamming your audience
  • Build awareness and (ideally) the right kind of following

They can be a really powerful tool, BUT they’re also new. And everyone is still guessing.


So (of course) I had to develop a scientific experiment to try and answer all of my questions!

Or at least as scientific as I can make an inherently subjective platform.

Introducing the 40-day Trial Reel experiment

First up - the control. I’m controlling everything except three variables:

1️⃣ Hook type

Not specific hooks—categories:

  • Straight ask / algorithm callout
  • Cheerleading & validation
  • Candid expert authority
  • Relatability / anti-hype

2️⃣ Reel length

Generally speaking, most agree that shorter b-roll video clips work the best for trial reels, but is there a sweet spot?

  • Short (5-7 seconds)
  • Medium (9-11 seconds)

3️⃣ Caption style

  • Short and sweet (1-3 lines)
  • Teaching / takeaway-driven (3-8 lines)


For the next 40 days (Monday - Friday), I will be posting 1 trial reel in the morning (between 8am and 10am) and 1 trial reel in the afternoon (between 1pm and 3pm).

I chose 4 hooks in each of the 4 categories for a total of 16 hooks to try. Each hook gets 4 variations to test for a total of 64 reels in this experiment:

  • Short video → Minimal caption
  • Short video → Teaching caption
  • Medium video → Minimal caption
  • Medium video → Teaching caption

In each set, the b-roll clip is exactly the same and the trending audio is exactly the same. Each set also includes the exact same CTA to end the caption, regardless of the length of the caption.

Editing, deleting or touching the reel in any way after it is posted is not allowed.

The end goal?

I want to build a simple matrix you can use: “If your goal is X, try this combination.”

I want to test and develop a clear starting point anyone can use and modify to their own goals and situation.

The Math

Every reel will be documented after 7 days and track Views, Follows, Shares, and Saves.

From that, I will calculate my baseline (aka my own average based on the last 3 months of my IG analytics - so my average Views per reel, average follows, etc.)

How Reels Will Be Scored
(and you can bet your ass I have a detailed spreadsheet to track all of this!)

REACH Score

Did the Reel get seen relative to my baseline?

Baseline = Average Reel views from the last 3 months

180%+ = 8

140–179% = 6

110–139% = 5

80–109% = 3

60–79% = 2

<60% = 0

GROWTH Score

Did it earn followers from the right audience?

Follower Conversion Rate = Follows ÷ Views

1.4%+ = 10

1.0–1.39% = 8

0.6–0.99% = 6

0.3–0.59% = 4

0.1–0.29% = 2

<0.1% = 0

VALUE Score

Was the content worth keeping or sharing?

Value Rate = (Saves + Shares) ÷ Views

2.3%+ = 7

1.6–2.29% = 5

1.0–1.59% = 4

0.5–0.99% = 3

0.2–0.49% = 2

<0.2% = 0

From this, I will calculate an overall Performance Score based on the number of points each Reel earns

  • 18–25 = Winner – Repeat & Scale
  • 13–17 = Strong – Optimize
  • 8–12 = Neutral – Informational
  • <8 = Miss – Do Not Repeat

This will be ultimately used to classify each reel as:

  • Converter – High Growth Score
  • Evergreen – High Value Score
  • Viral – High Reach, low Growth
  • Miss – Low across the board

Views alone don’t win this test. In fact, there are no actual "winners," just data points.

Because I honestly don’t care about one-off successes. I care about repeatable patterns.

And here's the kicker...I have NO IDEA if any of this will work at all! It could be a total and utter flop. Instagram is not my life and I don't have everything figured out. But I am game to try.

If you’re tired of marketing advice that sounds confident but explains nothing, you’re going to like this experiment.

Want to follow along?

I’ll be sharing the wins, the misses, the utter failures, and (hopefully) the patterns on a weekly basis here on The Chirp.

P.S. I'd love to know what questions you have about Trial Reels and if there is anything else you'd like me to research during this endeavor!

Let's get experimenting!

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The Chirp

Unfiltered marketing stories from the trenches. A real-life, no BS view of what it's really like to market a small business and ideas to make it all feel a whole lot easier!

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